accidentally or not...=|

hmmm...how to start this conversation...hmmm...*teary eyes*
I don't know what to say to you anymore...
the only thing that i know..
you hurt me..
hmmm...
I know some of my fellow friends feel weird toward me..
since I've been changing to that some kind of quiet person..
hmmm...
if I could think any best reason for that..
its all because of YOU...
huhuhu...
you are running away from me..
I don't know whether its happen accidentally or you are despise of me..
huhuhuhu..
this question always play through my mind when I'm thinking of you..
what exactly you want from me??
why you run away from me??
are you expecting me to disappear??
if its so..
then just tell me..
and let me go...
since you keep quiet...
I can't see the vision of you have towards me..
haaaa....
damn...
what exactly happen right now??
it feels like nothing is right...
*sigh heavily*
i don't know..
what is going on between us..
I tried my best to never be suspicious to you..
but then...
you show me that I should be suspicious with you..
what is wrong with you??
If you don't need me anymore..
just say it..
I might feel hurt..
but atleast..
I can move on and try to forget all of those memories..
I can delete all your messages in my phone and say that I will move on..
and still,
I can be friend with you..
but now...
I can feel there is a great wall between us..
and the distance also too far for me to reach..
is this what you really want??
hmm..
wanna know something??
I keep all your words...
and hoping you will keeping my words..
I won't lick back what I just spit off...
the moment I said that I'm gonna take care of you..
I really mean it..
I know..
as a human being..
I  committed wrong to you several times..
but try to understand this one little fact..
that you are also a human being..
we make mistake,and up to us whether to cover it back or just leave it there..
and yes I admit..
that I've hurt you with my words and my wrong doing..
and you grnat me a chance,and I grab it so I can make you see,
I try my best to be the best for you..
but right now..
I'm completely out of my mind and I don't know what to do..its seem like...
you don't need me anymore..
then all I ask is..
tell me that you're leaving..
hmmm...
thanks for everything..
I appreciate it..
=|